Just before over-oxygenating my system into a blissgasm of tears, laughter, body tingles, screaming, revelation (romance! finance! forgiveness! possibility!) and a general gust of massive healing, I heard Samantha Story say:
“You can’t take anyone anywhere you’re not willing to go yourself.”
We were about to get into the active section of a Breathwork + Crystals group, co-facilitated by Christel Alberez at Indigo Healing Arts. Samantha was talking to a room full of yogis, healing practitioners, and other people who are consciously traveling on a spiritual path in one way or another. In hindsight, my macro interpretation of Samantha’s announcement is:
If we want a peaceful planet, we have to become peaceful planets ourselves, first.
For me, I went right to business land. I asked myself: If it’s my job to create beautiful, connected, functional branding for entrepreneurs that I adore, do I like my own branding?
Answer: nope. The photo I’d been using was nearly 3 years old. My brand colors were off. I cringed each time someone asked for my business card because I didn’t have one.
So I took action.
It’s also my job to build client converting websites for individuals and small businesses. Was I proud of my own website and was it working well enough to take care of my visitors? No, I wasn’t and it wasn’t! I’ve given all of my computer time to clients. That choice has been prosperous, honored agreements I’ve made with other people, and has brought me great joy. However . . .
Having websites we don’t like keeps us small, hidden, and unable to take care of people at the levels we’re meant to serve.
I gave myself the gift of my own coding skills, and redeveloped my entire website. What a relief.
Another also: I want my business coaching clients to build their mailing lists, create valuable content, and send out regular communication to their people. How could I support my clients in doing this if I didn’t have the bandwidth, discipline, or courage do this work myself?
So I started Wednesdays With Leah Moon.
And it’s cute! (It’s what you’re reading right now!)
In healing land, which is also my job: I walk with clients and students through trauma recovery, learning about real self care, navigating grief, loss, success, and hidden desires. Was I doing that big, dark, deep, full, light, vigorous work myself?
Commitment to healing my life is what led me to the Breathwork + Crystals circle in the first place. That’s what leads me to give myself Reiki, meditation, happy food, exercise, and so many other inner work practices that allow me to stay embodied through the tides of life.
I want to stay in the room (metaphorically and literally) when I’m at the edge of too much.
An “edge of too much” can arise from objectively awful or wonderful happenings. Either one, and a spectrum of in-betweens, can send us to the edge of too much where various dissociative coping mechanisms come up to try and help us survive.
As I updated my branding, website, and consistent communication with the outside world via this blog and weekly newsletter, I also doubled up on my self care practices to support myself as I become more visible, successful, and able to be generous in sharing what’s working.
We practice. On our own and together. Again and again.
And it works. There’s no getting it wrong and there’s no getting it done. We’re on an endless journey through time and space.
Where do you want to go next?
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